Today is day 10 of my Paleo challenge. I was supposed to write a blog post on Wednesday for Day 7 of my personal Paleo Challenge but I was feeling absolutely terrible that day and could barely function. I had to skip out on the 6:30am and 9:30am fit clubs because I just… couldn’t… see myself… moving. I realized that maybe I was burnt out from 3 straight days of LONG and INTENSE workouts, plus I hadn’t taken a day off just to myself in… actually, I can’t remember how long. I’ve also been hustling with work stuff even more than usual and on top of that, I’ve been working more with people, which can personally be energy-draining for me (like I’ve said before, I’m a graphic designer, so I work best alone… this is also why I needed to get my own place.) And finally, my old crazy roommate is back with more shenanigans, so the stress from that has been slowly taking it’s toll.
I decided it was time to take the entire day off from everything and just lay in bed watching Netflix. I was craving carbs so bad, and all I wanted was comfort food: french fries, a burger, pizza, cookies, etc. I tried to resist the urge until about 2pm, when I decided to make some paleo-friendly banana-coconut cookies in the afternoon, hoping that would stifle my carb cravings.
I waited another 3 hours, until I felt like I was literally going to die. It was then that I said “F IT. I’m ordering pizza.”
I got on my EAT24 app and found a Pizza restaurant that had gluten-free pizza dough (I figured that was the least I could do) and ordered a whole chicken pesto pie, plus hot thai wings… plus a REAL chocolate chip cookie, made with refined sugar and real milk chocolate (I’m the devil, I know.) It was all delivered straight to my door within an hour and I sat there, with my Netflix and my comfort food, and ate by myself in complete and utter delight. I had taken 2 Thermo-Bonds and a Snack Defense about 45 min before the food came, so I felt like I was combating the fat and carbs as best I could in my predicament. Those supplements actually WORKED! By “work,” I mean that I felt full after 2 slices and 3 wings. Absurd! That’s not like me. I went on to stuff my face with 2 more slices and ate that entire damn cookie. There’s always room for dessert! I put the leftovers in the fridge for another day.
After all of this, I felt better and happier, although I had an extreme stomach ache. I forgot what it felt like to have inflamed intestines (sorry to be slightly graphic, but I’m pretty sure you can handle it,) since I’ve haven’t been eating this kind of food in about 2 weeks. I wasn’t sure if it was worth it, simply for that reason.
The next day, I got up and did a 4-mile fasted run along the bay. I felt soooo much better after that! I ate clean all day, got a ton of work done that I’d been putting off for a while, but then around dinner, my Blerch reappeared. He kept nagging and nagging me to finish that pizza and those wings. He told me I could go to the gym tonight and just burn it off. I figured the leftover pizza and wings had to be finished off at some point… I wasn’t going to waste them! And I figured I might as well get rid of them today instead of prolonging this whole fiasco, so I caved and ate the rest.
I had a little stomach ache after, but my energy was still good. I decided to drive for Lyft around 10pm. I felt good at first, but then all of a sudden my blood sugar levels dropped and I became super grumpy. My stomach started to hurt again and I couldn’t find the strength in me to be friendly to people. All I wanted was to pick up a California burrito and go home.
I was home by 11pm, sans the California burrito, and I ran around my kitchen hunting for something, anything, I could compromise my cravings with. I needed carbs. That’s when I found the box of Quest bars that had just been delivered to my door earlier that day. I ripped one open and sank my teeth into a Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Quest Bar, which tasted as close to the real thing as anything clean could. MMMM.
I crawled back into my bed and turned on Netflix. My cravings for more food was still there, so I grabbed those Paleo banana-coconut cookies I made the previous day, drizzled some honey on them, and finished them off.
I passed out shortly after that.
I woke up this morning, angry at myself and feeling grouchy. This needs to stop. I’ve gotten rid of all the pizza and wings and cookies in my apartment so now it’s time to refocus. I made some hot green tea with Herbalife Mango Aloe, took all my tablets, and made a healthy smoothie with all good stuff in it (Vanilla F1 Sport, Strawberry Muscle Egg, Spinach, Carrots, frozen blueberries, and Active Fiber Complex.) I’m feeling better, now that I started my day off right and I have better energy than I started with. It’s going to take a lot for me to resist my cravings today, but it will feel better than the alternative.
Looking back and assessing WHY this all happened, I think maybe I wasn’t eating enough, which is hard to believe, as I’ve been eating a lot lately. But I’ve also been working out a lot more intensely, and roughly around 3 hours a day. Perhaps I haven’t been getting enough protein either, and since I ran out of my Aminogen, I may have not been absorbing all of the protein I’ve been putting in my body (by the fact that I can only absorb 25g. of protein at a time.)
On a positive note: I’ve been taking pictures every day of my progress for the past 2+ weeks, and even though I don’t feel like I’ve changed, I can totally see the difference in the pictures 🙂 I’m going to use those as my fuel to power myself through this bump in the road on my journey to success.
Just because I took a wrong turn off my highway, doesn’t mean I have to keep going that way. I can turn around and get back on the highway anytime I want. Today I plan on getting off the WRONG path, turning around, and getting back on the RIGHT path.